Tiger Woods and Stevie Wonder in a Bar

Tiger Woods & Stevie Wonder are in a bar.

Tiger turns to Stevie and says, ‘How’s the singing career going?’

Stevie replies, ‘Not too bad. How’s the golf?’

Woods replies, ‘Not too bad, I’ve had some problems with my swing, but I think I’ve got that right, now.’

Stevie says, ‘I always find that when my swing goes wrong, I need to stop playing for a while and not think about it. Then, the next time I play, it seems to be all right.’

Incredulous, Tiger says, ‘You play GOLF?’

Stevie says, ‘Yes, I’ve been playing for years.’

Tiger says, ‘But — you’re blind! How can you play golf if you can’t see?’

Stevie Wonder replies, ‘Well, I get my caddy to stand in the middle of the fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him. Then, when I get to where the ball lands, the caddy moves to the green or farther down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice.’

But, ‘how do you putt’ asks Tiger.

‘Well’, says Stevie, ‘I get my caddy to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball toward his voice.’

Tiger asks, ‘What’s your handi cap?’

Stevie says, ‘Well, actually — I’m a scratch golfer.’

Woods, incredulous, says to Stevie, ‘We’ve got to play a round sometime.’

Stevie replies, ‘Well, people don’t take me seriously, so I only play for money, and never play for less than $10,000 a hole. Is that a problem?’

Woods thinks about it and says, ‘I can afford that; OK, I’m game for that.. $10,000 a hole is fine with me. When would you like to play?’

Stevie Wonder says, ‘Pick a night.’

Vila Sol – Sunday 29th April – Stableford Competition

We once again teamed up with Vila Sol for their regular Sunday Stableford competition. High season at the moment so a green fee of just €40.00 and buggies at €30.00 is great value. The Championship (1-18) was selected today which is a challenging layout at anytime of the year.

The course was in great condition and much improved from when we had played it mid March. A good turnout today with a field of 44 players ensured a busy morning at the course and the weather held out for us after some ominous dark clouds passed over.

1st: Mike Green (h/c 23): 37pts
2nd: L. Nelson (h/c 25): 34pts
3rd: Manuel Oliveira (h/c 15): 34pts

Best Chez Carlos Society player:
David Bowles (h/cap 9): 32pts (6th)

Espiche – Wednesday 25th April – Pairs Betterball

The newest course to open in the Algarve, Espiche has been 17 years in the making and opened with a soft launch 15th February ’12. It is located on the north side of Lagos, beyond Boavista and through the town of its own name.

Espiche Golf is a monitored course on an environmental programme linked to the University of the Algarve and various departments within the Algarve’s Commission for Regional Development (CCDRA). The land on which it is built is classified as an Ecological Reserve and made of a geological structure of a karst rock (lime stone) which has a water lens aquifer below it.

Designed by South African golf course architect Peter Sauerman Espiche has been laid down on a hilly terrain thick with natural indigenous undergrowth. The fairways make full use of the natural undulating slopes and hollows and are flanked on occasions on both sides by rough – once in then a shot out is unlikely.

The front nine is more sheltered from the elements with the back nine the harder to play as it climbs to the crest of the hill and into the wind. Wild countryside views all around add to the beauty of the course with natural stone walls cleverly placed within view and in play. Calcada buggy paths take the strain off the course weaving their way from green to tee.
Buggies and electric trolleys are limited so best reserve at time of reservation. There are ample pull trolleys.

The Society assembled at Parkies Cafe for breakfast and set off in good time for a tee off time of 11:30. If you were to take the old EN125 road or the toll road A22 motorway it is going to take the best part of an hour to reach to reach Espiche from Vilamoura. Toll for a small car is around €11.00 return.

Reports had been received that the greens were in poor shape but all 15 players insisted on trying this latest addition to the Algarve. A pairs betterball was chosen as the format of the day – probably a good decision as no one really knew where we were going and the course looked quite challenging!

Facilities are basic with the clubhouse scheduled to be built later in the year so we gathered in Espiche town for post game refreshments and nibbles. Everyone enjoyed the course commenting on its layout and views – many would return again once the greens were sorted. Eight of the group then headed off to Guia for a piri-piri chicken dinner.

1st: David Bowles & Carlos Ferreira: 38pts

2nd: Roland Russell & Bob Walker: 35pts

Nearest The Pin (7th): Bob Walker